11.19.01 black magic woman

have been reading little, watching little, accomplishing little. work friends juggle three and four jobs, multiple performance groups, multiple partners...i, on the other hand, ended up backing out of a reasonable night of work at slim's because i wouldn't have time to get the apartment together for family later this week. several half-excuses: having your mum over for A First Holiday is big. not gut-clenching big, but still. and though slim's would be a great racket - good money, meeting bands, so on - i had a violent ego moment about it the other night. i would like to buy things; i am not in a coat-check state of mind, though. no art to suffer for, lately.

so med students do the whole saved by the bell eggsitting-as-life-experience thing with human skulls. saturday i met several kids who were in the middle of this: one has to brush the moss from her skull's teeth, sid's is his drinking buddy, and so on. i love yicky stuff, and i couldn't even touch one. bad, bad vibes. on to a conversation about stone removal - "we were in there anyway, so we thought we'd just do him a favor" as in impromptu liposuction with handfuls of oh my. i thought draining abscesses on our lunch breaks was hard core. this is what led to the ego moment: i came home from that party and checking coats turned my stomach. casual work, okay: outerwear, no. medicine hells yes, but no skull-touching.

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