Q: what do you call a fat goth?
A: vampire the buffet slayer.

courtesy of The Man, i saw madonna's show at madison square garden on wednesday. she's more spectacle than musician, of course, but she's one of the more effective spectacles i've seen. after a few hours of 'heavy hors d'oeuvres' and open bar + the skanky champagne and strawberries they sell on the arena floor, i found myself shouting that is TRUE! during "express yourself." in fact, it was.

the faustian transaction was that said hors d'oeuvres were secretly full of chicken. hell if i know what that tastes like - i haven't eaten it for more than ten years. so a little bit of my soul died when i realized the meatless egg rolls just weren't. sadly, punk rock vomiting hasn't been hip since college.

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