03.20.02 rose to her roman nose

i was desperate for calamity when i was small, but it never worked out - emily was the one who fell through a pool filter and tore her leg on the swing set, joanna the one who broke the same finger in two doors and got caught with a rock in the neighbor-kids / goat incident. me, i didn't even manage to catch chicken pox until junior high. i'd eat poisonous plants, jump from balconies - nothing. joanna puked on my head once, but that was about it.

the fixation was tasteless rather than morbid - i wasn't starved for attention, i was just bored. i'm a scar party these days, but my misfortunes are ridiculous - cosmic retribution, i guess, for being so flip about health. big scar on my back from a taco bell wheelchair access ramp. a nasty old burn on my arm, thank you muffin pan. today a rather substantial hole in my hand - big angry, um, poodle. like being mauled by an afro.

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