spring break shark attack (*1/2). perfect made-for-tv movie: not the sort of thing one would leave the house and pay to rent, but just the thing to wind up a drizzly sunday evening. the oc's shannon lucio does a fine job of filling out her bikini top and screaming, many others disappear into satisfying army of darkness-esque fountains of blood, and i got to sing wailing souls' "shark attack" over and over. and over. inexplicable references to desperate housewives aside, a surprisingly enjoyable experience.

update: naturally the good folks at the black list agree.
SPRING BREAK SHARK ATTACK: I thought Sunday night movies were for Mitch Albom and Oprah. Well, not this Sunday. "Spring Break Shark Attack" was the ultimate in dumb, gory fun and answered the age-old question: "What would happen if there were 600 hungry tiger sharks loosed upon dimwitted college kids on a booze cruise?" Well, everything you'd expect. That guy that slipped you roofies the night before? He gets torn to shreds. How about your boyfriend that dicked you over at the club to go night-swimming with the boobtastic blonde? They were both torsos washed up on the beach the next day. And the dude that picked Bucknell and Vermont in your NCAA pool? Yeah, he got his face bit off too. A -- A.J. Daulerio

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