09.26.12

09.14.12: tino sehgal's "these associations," turbine hall, tate modern. eddies of loose-limbed men and women in performance artists' conspicuously plain clothing catch at each other across the hall's concrete. some have snagged on the walls in groups of two or three; others spin away in my wake as i pass. i take the center of the room slowly, let its gravity pull me down. i'll take a few deep breaths and leave. i'll sit to demonstrate that i'm not afraid and i'll leave. "it was when i was four years old, and my mother and i were sitting on her bed," the woman suddenly at my shoulder says. she's scooted across the floor to get next to me and has folded her wrists across her knees. her father was frequently absent from their home, and it made her mother cry; she herself was too young to know how to respond, to address her mother as another person in need. this was in greece. i tell her that my father once asked me if i thought he deserved to be happy - this was in the months after he left my mother, when i was out of college and living in san francisco - and i realized that i was not going to be a child. the lights in the hall go out, one by one, and as i rejoin joe on the stairs i haven't yet decided if i'll tell him what we talked about.

5 comments:

Rachel (heart of light) said...

Oh my god! I mentioned to Dustin that you'd tweeted about the turbine hall installation, he reminded me that it was that particular piece we'd heard about and I immediately told him we must be wrong, because it seemed so unlikely that you would go in there. You did it! (I feel slightly shriveled inside just thinking about it, but I'm glad you braved it)

Amid Privilege said...

Oh my god. Exactly what went through my mind. That kindness exists was what I exclaimed about.

kidchamp said...

each of our bus rides took us past the home of rest for old horses. the isle of man broke my heart.

anonymous said...

Shivers.  Some of them shivers of revulsion (strangers. Talking to me. In an art gallery. About inappropriate things. SHIVERS.) but mostly shivers at your beautiful writing. 

Cara (P&P) said...

(That was me.)